Forgiveness

Why is it that we remember the things people do that hurt us or that we don't agree with more than we remember the good times we share and all that they do right in "our eyes"? It makes forgiving difficult as we hold on to those negative memories.

Recently, I was asked about forgiveness, which is definitely something I had to deal with...a challenge of mine that I faced...and still do face on occasion. I think we all do. But I can only speak for myself. In this blog, I have talked about my past...been open and honest about times in my life...and struggles that I still face. Why? Because I need to be honest with myself and with you. Because I can only speak on what I know, and what I know is me. So get ready for some honesty.

I could chose a scripture verse to share with you that deals specifically with forgiveness and judgement. But there is a verse that I came across in 1Samuel, that really showed me a different perspective...a different way to think of forgiveness.

1Samuel 16:7
The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."

I know this verse is not speaking about forgiveness, but it made me really think about forgiving. Because forgiveness deals a lot with the way we look at each other. How? Have you ever taken the time to really get to know the people in your life, to understand each one of them as individuals, to get to the "heart" of who they are...not putting any preconceived notions on them or stereotypes...not putting them on a scale of standards they should meet? Or do you just notice a few of their qualities that are similar to yours and automatically assume that you know them, understand them, know what you would do if you were them or in their situation?

I had come to the realization a while ago that I had put expectations on those around me. Expectations that go beyond seeing the person they are and could become, but expecting them to think like me or act like me....sometimes even putting higher standards on them, than the standards I put on myself. I didn't take the time to UNDERSTAND them... to see them as individuals or UNDERSTAND where they were coming from. So when I felt hurt by something they said or did or felt that they made a mistake, I began to "JUDGE" them more and more, holding on to the mistakes they made, seeing only their "physical" aspects and actions rather than looking into their heart, as God looks into our hearts to see who we really are. He sees past our own flaws and sees the heart of us, the special and unique ones he created us to be.

Literally, one morning, I woke up early just tired of it all. Tired of holding on to grudges, tired of judging...because it all was filling my heart leaving no room for the Father of Forgiveness, the one who wants to take it all from us if we just let him. So right then and there I gave it all to him, all of it...forgiving those who didn't even ask for forgiveness, just letting all of it go so that He could fill my heart, so His love could fill my heart, so that when He looked past my physical features and my imperfections, He could finally see the heart He created with a purpose to love and praise, not to judge.

Who am I to judge? For I am only human, I too make mistakes, and I too need to be forgiven. Thankfully, Christ has given us the gift of forgiveness. He sees our hearts. So I strive to look into the hearts of others, I strive to truly forgive from the heart, and I strive to share with others the love, mercy, and grace that God fills my heart with every day.